kahuna massage

Radical Forgiveness

Online Psychics || Spiritual Quotes || Spiritual Articles || Spiritual News Blog ||

Ascension Gateway - Spiritual Article
Articles and information on Spirituality and New Age philosophies

Ascension Gateway> Spiritual Articles> New Age Articles> Relationships> Radical Forgiveness

Radical Forgiveness

by Alex Paterson

Radical Forgiveness is an extension of the primary truth underlying all reality, namely that everything in the Universe is an expression of a singularity which I choose to call Source and most others call God, and as such everything in the Universe is interconnected.

Radical Forgiveness is based upon the simple premise that the 'dark' or shadow aspects of our psyche which we need to acknowledge and heal are reflected for us in those who have significant impact on our lives - be they lovers, spouse, work colleagues, children, parents, friends, mentors or so called enemies. As Tipping quite rightly pointed out: "if you spot it (a behavior trait) in others, then you have got it. (Yourself)."

The key word in the above statement is 'acknowledge'. Whenever we try to deny something we don't like by pretending it does not exist in us, we invalidate it. To invalidate means "to render having no effect", but the great irony is that as soon as we attempt to invalidate something it immediately demands attention to be validated. The reason for this is simple. Invalidation by definition is an attempt to separate out that which one wishes to invalidate from those aspects we choose to acknowledge. From the perspective of the essential 'ONENESS' pervading the Universe, separation is an illusory 'artificial' state requiring a huge amount of energy to maintain. When we suppress something by invalidating it, we think the issue has gone away, but this is a delusion because the issue will inevitably reappear at some stage to be acknowledged and validated and this process cannot be avoided. Invalidation is a bit like trying to stop the flow of a stream; it can be achieved for a little while, but eventually the weight of water builds up and overwhelms us and continues to flow in accordance with the natural law of balance.

The following definitions are important and need to be clearly understood.

Invalidate: Definition: To render invalid which means to render something "having no effect". (Source: Websters Dictionary 1898)

Judgment: Definition: The act of judging involving the comparison and merit of a thing or question. Source: Oxford Dictionary

Discernment: Definition: The act of discerning which is to perceive clearly with the mind or the senses. Source: Oxford Dictionary

Note: There is no value judgment associated with the act of 'Discernment', as opposed to 'Judgment'. Alex Paterson 2000

At our essence we are energy expressed as LOVE and love expresses itself as an urge towards Unity.

When two people meet and are attracted to each other, energy (which is love) begins to flow between them and they experience the emotion of fraternity and in some cases, falling in love. Initially, this flow is unrestricted because the people involved do not judge each other, but with the passage of time one or both of them invariably begin to apply judgment about the other person. As defined above, judgment is a form of discernment in which our Ego consciousness applies 'value' or 'merit' to the different aspects of the thing we are discerning. However, this thinking is fatally flawed as everything in the Universe is a manifestation of SOURCE and despite the perception of separation that is fundamental to experience in this realm (i.e. the Physical Universe ), nothing is ever really separate from anything else and as such everything is of equal validity and value. The moment the Ego assigns value to something over and above something else by judging it, it invalidates all the aspects of so called 'lesser' value which creates disharmony (disharmony) resulting in an energy blockage. Thus, instead of the energy flowing freely between two people in a relationship, it begins to spiral back in on itself in order to heal the disharmony. This process manifests itself as emotions of fear, distrust and separation. It is from the perception of separation that we then create our victim stories in which we allege the other person or persons "did something to us". The truth of course, is that we manifested the whole process in cooperation with the soul (or souls) of the other people involved in the drama for the purpose of healing the shadow aspects of our psyche, which have been mirrored by the others involved in the drama for us. (More on this later)

At its essence, Radical Forgiveness is about reminding ourselves that we are not really separate from our Source (God), and that we are entirely responsible for the circumstances we find ourselves in. It is from the perspective of this universal truth that our ego 'victim stories' are revealed to be the nonsense that they really are, and once reminded of this 'truth', the victim story then collapses.

Colin Tipping's Radical Forgiveness healing technique is elegantly simple.

Tell the story. The story is the Ego's perception of the situation. The story is the energy associated with the blockage. The story needs to be witnessed by someone without interruption in order to validate it. Validation is at the crux of the issue. By definition, invalidation is an attempt by the Ego to create a form of separation, which in reality is an impossible task because absolutely nothing can possibly be separated from its SOURCE, that being God. It is because of this that anything that has been invalidated by the Ego (which is part and parcel of the illusory perception of Separation) requires an inordinate amount of energy to maintain that state of affairs because it is an artificial, illusory state of Being.
NOTE: Judgment, and the invalidation that goes with it, is the main reason most humans die of degenerative diseases (dis-ease) at the present 'time', but I digress .... (AP)

Feel the Feelings (emotions) associated with the story, be they anger, hurt, rage, etc. This is very important because this is the point of power. Then...

Collapse the story using the Radical Forgiveness worksheet or some other technique. The Radical Forgiveness worksheet is but just one technique in which one applies effort and intent towards honestly addressing the situation at hand through the auspices of writing about it. The worksheet leads one to acknowledge and 'own' the situation - to recognize that one is entirely responsible for the situation at hand.
Note: As one becomes more adept in 'owning' the situations confronting us (by accepting our responsibility for them), one can dispense with tools like the Radical Forgiveness worksheet and just cut to the essence of the process by simply giving thought to the situation in an honest manner .

Perform a Radical Forgiveness reframe of the situation. This shifts the perception from one of Ego separation (victim story) to a recognition as to the essential Oneness of all reality and a recognition of the perfection associated with the event. At the heart of Radical Forgiveness is the recognition (and acceptance) that we are all entirely responsible for the situations we find ourselves in - that we have undoubtedly 'created' the experiences (good or bad) confronting us for a reason. (that reason is always associated with the Soul's inexorable drive for self realisation) In other words, we don't change the event itself, we just change our perception and beliefs around it.

Integrate it. We hold our story in every aspect of our bodies, so we must integrate our new story into our whole Being.

NOTE 1: One does not need to believe in 'Radical Forgiveness' for the technique to work. As Tipping quite rightly advises "just fake it till you make it."

NOTE 2: The effect of performing a Radical Forgiveness reframe of a situation is often immediate. Tipping related an anecdote that illustrates this point. A client of his was still bitter years after the event about being out negotiated by a business associate of hers over some intellectual property she had created. As the business associate said to her when she complained about the poor nature of the deal to her, "business is business and as a businessman I'm ruthless". Tipping suggested they perform a Radical Forgiveness reframe of the situation to which she readily agreed. After performing the reframe she drove back to her hotel, only to find a message on her answering machine from the very same former business partner wishing to renew the contract pertaining to the intellectual property in question. (she had forgotten that the original deal had a sunset clause in it) A check of the date/time stamp on the answering machine revealed that he had made his call to her literally one minute after the Radical Forgiveness reframe had been completed! Needless to say she drove a very hard bargain this time around which more than compensated for her 'losses' associated with the original deal. As she said to him when it came time to sign the new deal "business is business", something he quite happily agreed with. (presumably, he had some respect for her this time around)

NOTE 3: Once we begin to heal and process the shadow aspects of ourselves reflected by the other person, the state of the relationship between those involved has served its purpose and the relationship can either move on to a new level, or end.

NOTE 4: As we heal shadow bits of our psyche, more suppressed shadow bits begin to rise up from our subconscious in order to be processed. In other words, the road actually gets harder commensurate with our capacity to handle it. Fortunately, we find that with practice we start to get good at dealing with the issues rising up before us and then the 'Game' starts to become fun. Just like a good baseball player, we start to look forward to confronting the pitcher and dealing with whatever he or she serves up to us

Alex Paterson is a former airline pilot, now living in Queensland, Australia. He writes articles and advises on issues pertaining to aviation, politics, sociology, the environment, sustainable farming and forestry, history, computers, natural health therapies, esoteric teachings and spirituality.See his website at www.vision.net.au

Spiritual Guide> Spiritual Articles> New Age> Relationship Articles> Forgiveness

Forgiveness Article

Love Poems | Inspirational Quotes | Wholesalers | Search Ascension Gateway | Biographies
About | Contact | Link to Us | Alphabetical Spiritual Quotes | Spiritual Directory | Shopping Directory

Ascension Gateway New Age Twitter

Copyright © Ascension Gateway.com - Spiritual Articles